Thursday, January 31, 2008

Mitt is Watching

A few months ago Aaron donated $25 to the Mitt Romney campaign. It was a nice gesture and I was just proud of him for caring enough about anything political to put forth the effort.

Mitt hasn't left us alone since.

Well, not Mitt per se, but you know what I mean. Aaron has gotten nonstop unsolicited phone calls from Team Romney saying things like, "I see that you donated $25 and I've got you down for $75 more, will you be paying by check or credit card?"

They have sent him mail solicitations almost on a weekly basis, special "Hooray you donated!" certificates, and the like. They've probably spent 6 times what he donated just trying to get him to donate more.

Then, today, in what I felt was the boldest move yet, they came to our house. I was napping with Wes and ignored the doorbell. After I got up, I found a manila envelope shoved in the door crack.

Inside the manila envelope was an extensive list of names, addresses, and phone numbers along with a cover letter explaining that we are to call all these people (there are at least 100) and tell them why we are voting for Mitt and urge them to vote for him as well. We are asked to "please call the names on this list between now and Sunday, or if some calling spills onto Monday that's OK." How magnanimous of them, giving us that extra day.

Next, they will be showing up at our door (possibly dressed like missionaries?) asking us to donate our souls to the campaign. And when we refuse, they will request our first born. Because they are shameless like that.

And so, I offer this word of wisdom to you: do not let any candidate know you exist, must less that you support him/her. Don't make eye contact. They can smell that $10 bill in your wallet and. they. want. it. Just back awaaaay from the political process. Show up to vote (I suggest wearing large sunglasses), then go home, lock your doors and close your blinds.

Because once they know where you are, they will not leave you alone. They will be watching. Mitt will be watching.

7 comments:

Ralphie said...

You get the best post award for the day. *aplause and hooting*

Melody B. said...

Ths picture of the eyes has me ROLLIN'! So funny! Whoa...note to self Mitt campaign/Jehovah's wittnesses!

Becky said...

That is hilarious!! I did volunteered to make calls for Jeff Flake's campeign when Gage was a baby, but they gave me a cell phone and there were never any questions asked. I'll help you make those calls. My sister's friend's family is doing it and they saw a lot of good come from it, many people were swayed towards Romney, but annoying to be referred to as a 'SOLICITOR' though!!

Kamy said...

When we had the caucus a couple of weeks ago, we got so many phone calls the week leading up to it including ones from the democratic party, don't know how they got our name. Anyway, so many people complained that our state started a do not call list for the political parties. You should see if they have it in Arizona!

N.F. said...

Wow! I'm shocked actually!

{ Bethany } said...

hahaha...oh dear, I cannot believe they wanted you to call 100 people!!!!

chosha said...

That's a little scary. Kind of like Mitt. (^_~)